Spent a couple hours at the Esplanade with Yanti, talking and chilling..told her about Deepa and classmates, first impressions of each other and how we got closer etc...introduced her Adeline, my colleague...it's nice having the chance to sit down and talk...we never get to do that..one thing's missing though, Fizah. She would have perfect the whole chilling thing. Yanti agreed that i should forget about her and get a life back. I should be strong for myself and be untangled from this web of apparent deceit and confusion. And i agreed that i should forget about her but somehow for a whole second, i felt bad, and questions started arising. Like what if i lost Deepa for good? Was it worthwhile? Can i not try harder? Did we?

I have had enough of her insecurities, faithlessness in me and the incapability to express her feelings. Well, apparently, she wasn't good in typing. And she still believes that i'm in love with someone else, for example, her college mate, Jean. I felt no connection and anything remotely interesting about her. Maybe I never did. She sent me this email and i read it. It was nothing new. We'll see how it'll goes..and whether i'm as strong as i believed in.

While Yanti sat and talk, i wished time would leave us behind so we could talk for as long as time's possible but of course, we can't. I actually waited for the last train for 10 minutes. I reached home around 1 in the morning and i had to go to work at 7..Yeah, work. Walked towards the mrt station with my manager who happens to live near me after work today...showed me in the direction of the train station so i could take train in the morning and not be stuck in the bus full of humans. She's kinda cool,i think, I don't know..talked about Jeslyn and this other girl from work and how their attitudes sucked and how we prayed that what they reap does bite them in their asses.

It's another new day of work and headaches plus stomach cramps and shiverings..hope i could get up in the morning and not be late.